Many Christian parents look to the church to train, teach, and disciple their children about things of God. People many times find comfort in sending their children to Sunday school, Youth group meetings, Bible studies, and other events/services churches offer people. Some people have determined in their mind that as long as they get their children to the building, they are doing there job as a Chrisitian parent.
Many people think that because the Bible says, "Not forsaking the assembling of yourselves together..." (Hebrews 10:25) they need to be at every church service and if they can accomplish that they have met their quota for the week. Then there are some people who think Sunday morning worship service is enough to provide the spiritual nourishment required for the soul. This strategy though, is no all it is to it, when training our children in the way they should go.
First, the church is not commissioned to teach, train, and disciple children. Scripture is clear that teaching, training, and discipling children is the responsibility of the parents (Deuteronomy 6:6-7; Proverbs 22:6; Ephesians 6:4). The church can be supplementary, however it is not to be the sole or even the primary form of teaching and training. The church is a gathering place for Christians to assemble to worship God, to hear the preaching of the Word, to exhort one another, to testify of God's glory and to have fellowship with the brethren. It is difficult then with all of this is going on for the church to focus on bringing children up in the Lord through teaching and training. This is something that must occur daily in each family.
Second, the church has a difficult time answersing questions the youth has. For example surveys of Christians have reported in the past that when in Sunday school questions about origins, evolution, millions of years, or science came up, they were not encouraged. Many times this is due to the fact the teacher is not confident in discussing it or even the teacher will say it is ok to believe in these things since they are being tought it in school. There utlimate response has been, "These things really don't matter. Just trust in Jesus." The issue with this is that the question does matter to the child, otherwise they would not have asked it. Also, if the child doesn't obtain the truthful answer to these questions, then they will ultimately seek it from another source that could lead them wrong. As a parent, we need to be ready to answer these questions as much as possible. Even if we don't know right away, parents need to study and pray on it and then provide the answer from a Biblical perspective.
Third, the church has struggled preparing children to defend their faith. Most of the time children's ministries such as Sunday School, Youth Groups, and Junior Churches simply entertain the children. This is not always the case, however often times this is the norm. Even in the more structured Sunday School class, all that is focused on is "Bible stories" as they go through the motions of reading a small passage. However the children need not be entertained or taught "stories" but rather be provided with the necessary instruction and demonstration to defend their faith. The difficult questions need to be brought up and answered (age appropriately) in such a way that if someone were to challenge their beliefs, they can back it up biblically. This requires lots of training during all the years of their youth, not just one or two days per week.
Fourth, for parents who have their children in non-Christian schools (e.g., Government schools), simply relying on the church is detrimental to bringing the children up in the Lord. Think for a moment of the amount of time most children spend in a secular, humanist environment where God is not permitted to be the ultimate authority on all things (e.g., orgins, morality, modesty, worldview, etc.). Most children spend about 6 hours a day, 5 days per week in an environment that is teaching things contrary to the Word of God. This equates to 30 hours per week. If parents solely rely on the church to teach and train their children, then that means they are competing for the mind and heart of their child with at most 3 hours versus 30 hours! This 30 hours doesn't include the possible 1-2 hours extra per day of homework which takes away valuable discipleship time. Then add extra curricular activities on top of this and there is not much time left for training in God's Word. Therefore, it boils down to being deliberate, diligent and disciplined to ensure they are getting proper spiritual training every day of the week. Only parents can achieve this, not the church.
We once relied primarily on the church for our children's growth in the Lord. As we grew in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ, we realized this wasn't effective nor was it Biblical. We realized the awesome responsibility as Christian parents to teach, train, and disciple our children (God's Heritage). We realized that it was our responsibility to shape them in the ways of God so when they grew up, they would be like an arrow and soar for the Lord quenching the wicked ways of Satan.
One of the ways we have implemented this in our family is daily Bible Time. We purposely do not call it "Bible Story" time since many times we have seen how children can get fictional stories confused with Biblical "stories". Instead we refer to things that occured in the Bible as "accounts". We are as diligent as possible to have daily Bible time that Michael usually leads. Often times the Bible time consists of discussions about scripture and what it means. Topics like sin, repentance, forgiveness are discussed pretty thoroughly. We also spend time discussing Godly character qualities to shape and form them in how to interact with others while obeying God at the same time. Also, Bible Time may include watching Biblical based videos (even science videos) which leads to discussions about how God's Word applies to all of life, not just in a church building or at home.
We also have implemented morning devotions that Colleen usually leads that sets the hearts and minds toward God first thing. Often this will involve character training and sometimes even focused for something specific that day (like being diligent in our chores; being grateful for time outside, being thankful for God's various blessings, etc.). Sometimes the devotion will include an activity, songs and also scripture memorization.
Lastly we have implemented prayer time. This is key to it all. If we simply instruct, train, and demonstrate without prayer, we are going to fail. Prayer is our communication line with God. We strive to have prayer as a family before Michael leaves for work and at bed time. We of course have prayer throughout the day as well as before leaving to travel somewhere. We encourage the children to pray which most of the time they are eager to do it! Sometimes all of us in the family will pray during the same prayer time. Nobody can pray too much.
Even with these things implmented, Satan is still that roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. He tempts us to cut back, tries to make us doubt God's Word (such as is this stuff really working?), puts thoughts of discouargement in our minds, and throws many other fiery darts at us. Although there is no "formula" for ensuring our children don't rebel, we still must do everything possible to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. That is why Bible Time/Devotion Time is essential for parents to do on a daily basis. Relying solely or primarily on the church is just not going to cut it. Church is simply not all there is to it!
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