Training Our Children's Hearts

Proverbs 4:23 states, "Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life." We must remember this scripture when we are raising our children. This scripture provides the ultimate truth with respect to the issues we experience within ourselves, in relationships, in families, in communities, and ultimately within the world. If there are issues, then we can rest assured they result from the heart. Knowing and remembering this during times when we experience problems with our children can help us address the problem better and more effectively although not always easily.

Where this comes into practice is when we notice unGodly character qualities in our children. When this happens and especially if it is embarrassing to "us adults", we as parents will tend to correct the outward behavior. For example, if see our child taking a toy from another child, we may be tempted to say, "Honey, that is not nice. Please give the toy back." Although what the parent said was correct, the parent must not stop there. The reason is that this method is only dealing with the symptoms of the problem, not actually getting to the root cause of the problem. The root of every problem (or issue) is the heart condition. Therefore, parents must get to the root of the problem to solve the issue. The root of the problem in this case most likely would be selfishness which results in only thinking about oneself and what oneself wants. It would also be stealing since the child took something from someone else without asking.

Once we have identified that the child was selfish and stole something, we as parents can point to scripture with the answer to solve the issue of the heart. We as Christian parents need to seek God's word for scriptures that deal with these types of issues and train our child's heart in that direction. For example, for selfishness, Philippians 2:3 could be used to train the child's heart to think of others before themselves - "Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves." For stealing, Exodus 20:15 could be used to show that stealing is wrong in the sight of God - "Thou shalt not steal." Planting these types of Godly seed in a child's heart daily will help in getting to root cause of the many issues of the heart. As the child grows into a mature adult, these truths will remain within the heart and will lead them into righteousness as long as they choose to do what God says is right!

If you are struggling to come up with scriptures to help solve the issues of the heart, we would recommend the following: 

1. Prayer - ask God to reveal to you His truth as you read and study His Word. Pray about the particular issue and ask for help in determining what His Word says about it.
2. Topical Concordance - through prayer, God may lead you to review a topical concordance. A topical concordance is an alphabetical list of topics and associated Bible verses. You can access concordances in the front or back pages of some Bibles, through Bible software, and the internet.
3. Biblical Supplement - This comes in many forms such as a dedicated concordance, special topics book, and curriculum. Basically, it is information that supplements your Bible study and helps guide you to scriptures dealing with your situation. As with anything derived by man, pray over these things to ensure the scripture is interpreted and applied correctly to the topic.